Yesterday I witnessed a colony of seagulls (more commonly refered to in Nova Scotia as Shit Hawks) scavenging for food
on Parc Ave. I decided to take a closer look at what it was they were squaking about. To my delight
the assholes were fighting over chicken fingers!!! I laughed and then the thought occured to me: Does this mean its okay for me to eat
people of a different race? I'm running with it.

I have a mild obsession with WikiAnswers as of late.

"What are Seagulls?"

Answer
Birds.

Answer
They are also called Herring Gulls. But mostly they are called "You &??%*&) Bastard"

Answer
Seagulls are sometimes referred to as 'dump ducks.'

Answer
Because if they were from the bay they would be bagels.



Of course if you know me, you know the last answer is my first choice.

In this case my body aches from the shitty futon I sleep on. The first futon I've put together myself btw. So proud.

Will someone please buy me this shirt, preferably in black.

Every time I think of her, I close my eyes.
She was a velvet doll, she was a punk rocker.
When I walked off stage I fell in love with her.
I stared at her from across the bar
- I want her near to me.
So close and dear to me.
Later that night she asked me home, so I
took her home where we were all
alone.
I think of her, when she's not around.
I think of her, when she's in the underground.
I think of her, when she's not in town.
I think of her.
I held her tight as she clutched my hand.
Can you understand? I gotta be her man.
She became special to me just in a night.
You see the dreams we have, the dreams we shared.
The for awhile, for about a week we
played a silly adult game of hide
and
seek.
But now I gotta have that girl to
be with me forever. Baby!
I think of her, when she's not around.
I think of her, when she's in the underground.
I think of her, when she's not in town.
I think of her.

I am LOVING The Weakerthans currently.

I would love to share these lyrics.

"Aside"
Measure me in metered lines
And one decisive stare
The time it takes to get from here to there
My ribs that show through t-shirts
And these shoes I got for free
I'm unconsoled
I'm lonely
I am so much better than I used to be
Terrified of telephones
And shopping malls and knives
Drowning in the pools of other lives
Rely a bit too heavily
On alcohol and irony
Get clobbered on by courtesy
In love with love and lousy poetry
And I'm leaning on this broken fence
Between past and present tense
And I'm losing all those stupid games
That I swore I'd never play
But it almost feels okay
Circumnavigate this body
Of wonder and uncertainty
Armed with every precious failure
And amateur cartography
I breath in deep before
I spread those maps out on my bedroom floor
And I'm leaning on this broken fence
Between past and present tense
And I'm losing all those stupid games
That I swore I'd never play
But it feels okay
And I'm leaving with goodbye
And I'm losing but I'll try
With the last ways left
To remember sing
My imperfect offering

I often wish that I could have a complete library of transcripts from past conversations in my life. I'd like to use them as reference material and over analyze every bit of information gathered.

Wish I had washed off last nights makeup.
Wish I had decided against that slice of cake for breakfast.

From my morning walk to work.

Jimmy Soul

Minor Threat

The Weakerthans

On File

You're so sexual, so intellectual, so perpetual, but mostly just ineffectual.

This is my brother, he is a genius and I miss him.

When you are THAT smokin' hot you will ultimately be a big ol gay man. Curse.

So here I am mindin' my business, swimming at a public pool, leaving my backpack on the side with my towel as I have done many times before. Spend some time laying in the clouds and then head to the changing room to get ready to bike home and lo and behold, my panties are M.I.A! One of my favorite pair. PLEASE BRING BACK MY PANTIES. On second thought please keep them as a parting gift, you panty sniffing weirdo.

Biking in a thunder and lightning storm is a close second to swimming in the buff, which is next to cleanliness, which is next to godliness.

I'm gonna draw a pie chart indicating how much I dislike bars. I'm gonna draw bar graph that depicts how much I like pie. Ted Mosby is my 3rd dream man.

Just read the title / get lost.

Sometimes you forget what it's like to be with a real live man.

This song isn't about me. Well it is. Not written by you. None of your songs could ever be about me, that's just it. I get it now. I can never provide you song material because I would never break you. I can't come see your shows anymore, I fall in love every time.

On the walk home "Life Is Beautiful" and a tiny flower scribbled on the guard rail. I smile. A basement apartment, I peer in and see a dirty mattress on the floor, nothing on the wall and an old man passed out at his modest table gripping a beer. I cry.




The one who gave me life.

This mornings texts: message.
"You are always the belle of the ball Alli, you light me up like a god damned landing strip"
Miss Detrimental Detardation has a way with words.




C- UNIIIITTTTT

Yesterday on the same sidewalk I witnessed two groups of people standing next to each other but unaware of the other's presence. The first group was a mother, father and a newly born baby, the mother and father taking turns feeding the baby a bottle. The second group, two middle aged adults and an elderly lady in a wheelchair, the man holding the chair while the woman fed the elderly lady a mug of water.

-Title quote Karl Kraus